Tag: parishes

100 Ways to Serve Your Church

Now, we’re all called to serve. And we’ve all got gifts (or so I’m daring to claim) that the world needs. We’ve talked about ways to be pro-life and ways to be a missionary before. But we’re also part of a local church, a parish that we want to help make into more than just a group of strangers who worship together. Ideally, it wouldn’t just be your church, it would be your church home. But how can you, normal and “untalented” as you are, work to build up your parish? Let’s brainstorm:1

  1. Fix the heinous parish website.2
  2. Spearhead the capital campaign.
  3. Strip and seal the pews.
  4. Painting in some church in Illinois that was unlocked on Easter Sunday afternoon.
    Painting in some church in Illinois that was unlocked on Easter Sunday afternoon. Props for the art and the hours.

    Make good Catholic art.

  5. Buy someone else’s good Catholic art to put in the sanctuary.
  6. Iron the altar linens.
  7. Invite your priests to dinner at your home.
  8. Introduce yourself to the mother of littles and ask if she’d like some help during Mass.
  9. Direct traffic in the parking lot after Mass.
  10. Organize refreshments for the parish mission.
  11. Podcast the homilies.
  12. Start a parish Facebook page.
  13. Cook dinner for the youth group.3
  14. Apologize when you’re wrong.
  15. Revamp the parish database to make it more searchable and user-friendly for the office staff.
  16. Take pictures at parish events.
  17. Host a supper club.
  18. Start a system of supper clubs where every new parishioner is invited to two or three different groups to find a good fit and build relationships.
  19. Buy copies of your favorite Catholic books to hand out.
  20. Start a club for anything you enjoy–knitting, fantasy football, ultimate frisbee, macrame,4 you name it. You’re building community!
  21. Sign up for an extra holy hour or six.
  22. Tell the parish office that you’re happy to drive people to Mass who can’t make it on their own.
  23. Easter candle liliesArrange flowers for the sanctuary.
  24. Take blood pressure readings for the elderly one Sunday a month.
  25. Go to confession. Take your kids. Take your neighbors. Take a stranger.
  26. Pray over the list of sick and recently deceased parishioners.
  27. Never complain except to somebody who could do something to fix the situation.
  28. Volunteer to babysit during the moms’ prayer group.
  29. Throw a baby shower for an unwed mother.
  30. Teach a class on something you’re good at–financial planning or modest fashion or cooking on a budget or web design.
  31. Start a group for the unemployed or underemployed in your parish where you can help each other improve your resumes and interview skills.
  32. Lead a monthly children’s holy hour.
  33. Reorganize the parish library. Toss the heresy and set up a display on a featured topic or author each month. (Think May: Mary; June: Sacred Heart; November: Holy Souls.)
  34. Drive the bus for youth group trips to camps or conferences.
  35. Organize a social hour after a different Mass each week.
  36. Offer 5 hours a week of free counseling to parishioners.
  37. Congratulate parents on their children’s behavior during Mass–even if it wasn’t flawless.
  38. Harmonize.
  39. Mine is a very big name, but not in quite the same way.
    Mine is a very big name, but not in quite the same way.

    Foot the bill to bring in a big name speaker.5

  40. Thank Father for a good (or better than usual) homily. Point out specifically what encouraged or challenged you.
  41. Get to know the people going through RCIA. Invite them out to coffee or over for dinner even after they’re received into the Church.
  42. Write an article for the parish bulletin.
  43. Share good Catholic reads on Facebook.
  44. Lead arts and crafts at Vacation Bible School.
  45. Offer to deep clean the super-pregnant mom’s home.
  46. Ask your pastor if there’s anyone in the community who could use a good friend right now.
  47. Schedule a biannual parish blood drive.
  48. Revamp the parish’s business model.6
  49. Offer to spend an hour every night (or a few hours once a week) guarding the church so people are able to come spend time with Jesus.
  50. Organize a fundraiser–a talent show or auction or gala or something. Make sure your poor parishioners can come.
  51. Fix the church’s sound system.
  52. Start a book club where people actually read the books. (The Well-Read Mom is a great one for women.)
  53. When I drove up to St. Anastasia in Troy, MI, I knew that they wanted me there. How can you make your parish welcoming?
    When I drove up to St. Anastasia in Troy, MI, I knew that they wanted me there. How can you make your parish welcoming?

    Introduce yourself to people after Mass.7

  54. Get a group together for a weekly or monthly service project.
  55. Recommend little-known movies with good themes for more articulate writers to review.
  56. Start a blog with icebreaker ideas for youth ministers–yours specifically.
  57. Do all the advertising for a big event.
  58. Repair the church’s 15-passenger van.
  59. Run for parish council.
  60. Give little toys to all the kids after Mass on holy days of obligation.8
  61. Repair Father’s worn-out cassocks and albs.
  62. Find all the parishioners who live in the same neighborhood and put them in touch with each other.
  63. Go door-to-door inviting people to Mass.
  64. Train Sunday school teachers in classroom management.
  65. Be a sign language interpreter at Mass.
  66. Give a guest lecture on stem cell research or global warming or some other sciencey thing.
  67. Like at this one in Jefferson City, MO.
    Girls’ Night in Jefferson City, MO.

    Host a girls’ night. Teach hair and make-up. Or self defense. Or improv. Or wilderness skills. Whatever.

  68. Teach a Catholic parenting class to go along with baptism prep.
  69. Volunteer to be the “funny guy” at youth events. Skits, emceeing, getting pied, eating toothpaste, you’re up for anything.
  70. Design a logo for your parish and other graphic design stuff that I know I need without even knowing what it is.
  71. Organize a summer program for kids in the area.
  72. Dress like Sunday Mass is the highlight of your life.
  73. Tell the parish office about your language skills and offer to serve as an interpreter for parishioners who struggle with English.
  74. Make first communion dresses for underprivileged girls.
  75. Tell people about your experience as a foster parent/organ donor/AA sponsor.9
  76. Don’t be Pollyanna. Share your struggles while still focusing on joy.
  77. Be present in the moment to each person you meet–even if they’re making you late for Mass.
  78. Here's how my niece and nephew did Pentecost. The faces are a response to this prompt: "Smile like the Holy Spirit is descending on you!"
    Here’s how my niece and nephew did Pentecost. The faces are a response to this prompt: “Smile like the Holy Spirit is descending on you!”

    Wear liturgically appropriate colors.

  79. Start meetings with prayer.
  80. If you work in the parish office, treat each person who walks in the door like an immortal soul ransomed by the blood of Christ. Nothing you’re doing on the computer is more important than the child of God standing before you.
  81. Study the history of your parish and give tours of the building.
  82. Put together a survey for the parish polling people on daily Mass and confession times. Compile the data and submit a recommendation to Father.
  83. Look at daily Mass times for all parishes in the area and suggest a schedule to help meet the needs of more people.10
  84. Design and build a Mary garden.
  85. Start a ministry to reach out to those who have recently lost a loved one.
  86. Organize a winter coat drive.
  87. Set up a Lighthouse Catholic Media kiosk at your parish.
  88. Get to Mass early to pray.
  89. Bake for funeral receptions.
  90. Be a sponsor couple for engaged couples. Invite them to your home and share your difficulties as well as your wisdom.
  91. Divide interested parishioners into small groups based on schedule, location, age, and state in life.
  92. Schedule events for senior citizens to build community.
  93. Start a pro-life group. Remember that being pro-life is more than being anti-abortion.
  94. Make awesome t-shirts for the youth group.

    Both shirts by my awesome friend Lindsey (who is available to do design and illustrations, particularly for Catholic stuff) but only the good photo. (She also does photography in N. Carolina and Northern Indiana)
    Both shirts by my awesome friend Lindsey (who is available to do design and illustrations, particularly for Catholic stuff) but only the good photo. (She also does photography in N. Carolina and Northern Indiana)
  95. Make a promotional video for your parish–particularly highlighting your RCIA or Catholics Come Home program.
  96. Invite a non-Catholic or lapsed Catholic to Mass.
  97. Stop by the Church every day to pray. You’ll be amazed to see how it encourages people to see others praying outside of Mass.
  98. Listen to music by different Christian artists. Give out CDs from your favorites.
  99. Trick out the youth room with homemade stadium seating, a stage, and a Nerf arsenal.
  100. Figure out where your gifts and the Church’s needs intersect. Do that.

I know a lot of these sound trivial. But take directing traffic. You may think, “Any fool can direct traffic. I’m just standing here waving my arms like an idiot.” But I know souls that would be saved if someone were facilitating the madhouse of the after Mass rush to brunch. Think how appreciative you would be if someone just took that in hand. And maybe you’d be more likely to come back. And maybe you’d approach that person and thank him and strike up a conversation and develop a relationship and strengthen the Church.

Many of these are little things. Or things that don’t seem very Churchy. But if the Church is a home, a family, the Body of Christ, then it’s going to be made up of all these little parts. And the little things work together to make a beautiful community. Don’t think you don’t matter. You matter. Now quit sitting around and make your church a better place!

 

Help me out here, folks. I’m doing the best I can with a mind that’s very oriented to certain kinds of service and not at all to others. What would you add to this list? Share your outside-the-box ideas in the comments!

  1. Obviously, get permission from the powers that be for any of this. [↩]
  2. I think the next edition of the Code of Canon Law should stipulate that all parishes in first world countries must have websites with Mass times–Sunday and daily–prominently featured on the homepage. I wonder if there is anybody in the world who spends as much time frustrated on parish websites as I do. [↩]
  3. Not lasagna. Every youth group in the country eats pizza or baked pasta whenever there’s dinner. Give them something different! [↩]
  4. What even is that? [↩]
  5. Not me. I mean, go ahead and foot that bill, but I’m free, so the footing of the bill won’t be terribly impressive. [↩]
  6. Is that even a thing? [↩]
  7. But not in the sanctuary. That’s for prayer. [↩]
  8. There’s a man at St. Matthew’s Cathedral in South Bend who does this every Sunday and the kids are absolutely thrilled about going to Mass. Sure, it’s for the toy, but anything that makes their reaction to Mass positive without hurting their ability to pray works for me! [↩]
  9. Is that last one allowed? Maybe the anonymity makes that a faux pas. [↩]
  10. There are towns where every Mass is between 8:15 and 8:30 am–at 4 different parishes! Someone take a 7am, someone a noon, and someone an evening and suddenly everyone can make it to Mass if they want. [↩]

The Church Needs You: A Pentecost Appeal

A while back, I had the opportunity to be in Oklahoma City for their annual half marathon and friends, I was SORE afterwards! Oh, I didn’t run it.1 But I cheered like it was my job. For five hours I shouted and danced and pumped my fists. I played “The Eye of the Tiger” for a few hours, then switched to “I Would Walk 500 Miles” when the walkers got there. My friends’ house was around the 12-mile mark, so when people passed us they were in need of a little encouragement. And I gave it to them. (My friend Anamaria wrote about it here.)

You can do it! You’re just like Rocky only better looking!

You are amazing! Your mom is proud of you and your wife is proud of you and your friends are proud of you and JESUS is proud of you!2

Do you realize you’ve done more this morning than I’ll do all month? You are awesome! And you’re almost there! You’re going to get to take a nap and NOBODY can you say you don’t deserve it because YOU RAN A HALF MARATHON TODAY!

You only have a mile and a half left and then you get to have a brownie. You know what? You can have all the brownies you want for the rest of your life because you are RUNNING A HALF MARATHON!

This was before anyone started running by, but you can tell I'm ready for an epic day of cheering.
This was before anyone started running by, but you can tell I’m ready for an epic day of cheering.

It was amazing the number of people who were walking and started running again (maybe to get away from the glitter and rainbows I was spewing at them) and the number who actually turned to thank me for the encouragement. I met a runner the next day and asked her if she remembered me.

“Did you have a baby with you?” she asked.

“That was me!”

“Yeah! You said, ‘He can’t run but you can. Do it for the baby!’ That was awesome.”

Seriously, guys, I am amazing at this. If you could be a professional half-marathon cheerer, I would do it. And I had a blast! I’ve already put next year’s OKC half in my calendar.

The people I was with, God bless them, were more impressed than put off by my intensity. They seemed to think it was a great favor I was doing the runners. And it got me thinking.

I’m good at yelling. I’m good at encouragement. I’m good at making a fool of myself. But I can’t run. I could never run a half marathon. I would quite literally die.3 And a half marathon can’t happen without runners.

That’s obvious. But it can’t happen without police, either. Or paper-pushers or fundraisers or web gurus or volunteers to hand out that sticky sludge they keep shoving down your throat. It can’t happen without organizers or city councils or urban planners or people sitting in front of their houses handing out Twinkies.4 The OKC marathon particularly can’t happen without people who still remember the terror of the bombing and others who want to honor their loss. A marathon is not just about runners.

The Church is the same way. I’ve got gifts that are particularly Churchy. I like attention and enthusiasm and telling people what to do, so I make a pretty good speaker. I also really like reading and being a know-it-all, so I manage some content in my talks. And because my natural gifts are showy, people think I’m a big deal and they’re not. Like the Church needs me but you’re just along for the ride.

That's the most important man in the world telling you that YOU are necessary. So deal with it.
That’s the most important man in the world telling you that YOU are necessary. So deal with it.

Lie. Big, fat, ugly lie. It’s a lie if you believe you’re not good enough and it’s a lie if you’re just letting yourself off the hook. I hate to break it to you, friends, but this Church needs you. As much as it needs anyone (and obviously, God can do whatever he wants without any pathetic little sinners), it needs you.

Maybe you don’t have any Churchy talents. Maybe you make children cry when you try to sing and you can’t read in front of a group without quivering in terror. Maybe you don’t feel comfortable talking about your faith, so you feel like leading a Bible study is out. When you take out all the artsy, feely stuff, what do you really have to offer?

You.

You have yourself to offer. Not just because Jesus desires that you give him your whole self but because the Church is the poorer because you haven’t stepped up yet. See, there’s only so many hobos a Church can sustain. We just don’t need that many missionaries. We need more than we have, that’s for sure. And we’re all missionaries in our own ways. But you don’t have to be a streetcorner preacher to serve the Church. If everybody did that, who’d plan the potlucks and update the databases?

I don’t mean that flippantly. We need that. We need good administrators and financial minds in our parishes–desperately. A loving parish secretary will impact more souls than I will. Maybe you’re only good at sports: coach a CYO team. Maybe you’re just a worker bee: ask the DRE what help she needs. Maybe you’re good at crafts: make Saint dolls and give them to children in your parish.

See, God gave you particular gifts. And while your ability to keep paperwork organized might seem rather mundane to you, I can bet your youth minister would kill for that skill. The talents you have–even things like being friendly or trimming bushes–have been given to you for the good of the Church. If you can get to a Called and Gifted Seminar,5 all the better. But until then, just sit down and ask: what am I good at? What do I love doing? And how can that serve the Church? Because I guarantee it can.

missing from ChurchIf you’ve been baptized (and especially if you’ve been confirmed), the Holy Spirit has moved in you–is moving in you. Not only did God create you with natural gifts, but grace has built on nature and you’re now a storehouse of divine power. It may not manifest itself in obvious ways, but God has been preparing you all your life to be a great gift to the Church and the world if only you’ll let him use you. And since it’s still Pentecost on the West Coast, I’m going to challenge you during this Octave of Pentecost6 to sit with the Lord and ask him how he wants to use you. I’ll even give you a bunch of ideas later this week–I know how you people love lists. Then spend Ordinary Time getting used to giving your time and talents in service to the Church as well as your treasure. We need you. We can’t all be epic half-marathon-cheerers, but if we don’t embrace the role God’s given us, the whole thing starts to fall apart.7

  1. Those who know me are far less confused now. [↩]
  2. Because it’s Oklahoma so you can mention Jesus. [↩]
  3. And no, by “literally” I do not mean “figuratively.” I mean that I would die of an asthma attack or be rolled off the course on a stretcher. [↩]
  4. Okay, maybe the Twinkies are unnecessary. And gross, particularly while running. But I bet some of those runners would notice if the Twinkie people disappeared. [↩]
  5. Disclaimer: I’ve never actually been, but I’ve heard great things and read some of the materials and it all looks good to me. [↩]
  6. Well, it used to be an octave. [↩]
  7. I mean, not the Church. “The gates of hell will not prevail against it” and all that. But our little churches can run into some serious trouble. [↩]

A Money-Making, Grace-Filled Game-Changer

When you go to something like 100 parishes a year, you see a lot of different attempts at wooing youth. There’s a lot of pizza and a lot of awkward games and a lot of good people trying to lead a lot of reluctant teens (and some interested ones) closer to Christ. I’ve seen some great youth ministers and some great Bible studies but the most beautiful community of youth that I’ve encountered was at a random parish in Southern Maryland.

Two years ago (as I remember the story) the pastor of St. John’s in Hollywood, MD walked up to the youth minister. “I hired two teens for the summer, so…we need to find something for them to do.”

Fr. Ray and Rich started brainstorming and wondered: “What would happen if we got young people going to Mass and adoration every day?”

So they did. They set up a day camp for that summer and started hiring 16-22-year-olds to staff it. But this isn’t just a job for these young people: it’s a mission summer. Yes, daily Mass and a holy hour and a theology class are written into their contractual day. They have to go. But there are events every evening of the week, too: pool parties and encyclical study groups and girls’ nights and bowling nights. Some of them are intense and intellectual, others more concerned about building community; all are optional. But the staff knows coming in that their summer job is not a 9-5 deal. They’re there to serve and they’re there to be transformed.

Adoration at summer camp? Why not?
Adoration at summer camp? Why not?

Even on paper, it makes so much sense. Here’s a Catholic school standing empty all summer–why not use the facility? Struggling with low enrollment in your parochial school? Draw families in during the summer and they’ll become part of the community.1 Can’t afford a youth minister? Camp fees pay the summer program staff plus a full-time youth minister year round. Families coming in for Mass on Sunday but not part of the community? Build community for them. It’s easy to fill your rosters because you can charge less than any other camp or daycare in the area while still paying all your bills–and once the price tag draws them in, the Holy Spirit will do the rest.

Wouldn't you want to go to a camp where you could take lego robotics? Or American girl dolls? Or paper making or chess or film production or soccer or cooking or creative problem solving or "Exploring Religious Life" or anything you can imagine?
Wouldn’t you want to go to a camp where you could take lego robotics? Or American girl dolls? Or paper making or chess or film production or soccer or cooking or creative problem solving or “Exploring Religious Life” or anything you can imagine?

But you guys, this is so much more than just what is practical and reasonable. This program is transforming the parish. The families know each other so their kids want to be at church events. Some kids have been received into the church as a result of their experience with the summer program; other families started at camp because it was cheap or convenient and are back practicing the faith again after years away.

The biggest impact, though, is on the staff. These kids take a summer to serve and they come away transformed. They learn theology in their classes and discussion groups, but they also learn it in their conversations with their peers. They learn to pray both by being expected to do it every day and by being led deeper by leaders and friends. They learn what true friendship looks like by building community with the staff–community that lasts well past the end of camp.

It doesn't hurt that they're surrounded by priests, seminarians, and religious....
It doesn’t hurt that they’re surrounded by priests, seminarians, and religious….

And it’s not just relationships with their newfound friends that last. During that first summer, two of the staff discerned a call to enter seminary and one discerned a vocation to religious life. Two more will enter religious life this fall, strengthened by the support of this incredible community. The ones still in high school are volunteering as catechists and itching to get back to camp. Those who are off at college are generally going to daily Mass and spending serious time in prayer. Honestly, they challenge me, when we’re all hanging out and they suggest that we go to the chapel instead. Or when I tell them they can read the whole Bible in a year in just 20 minutes a day2 and they ask if that’s really enough time to meditate on it.

I’ll be real with you: I’ve never met young people with such hearts for Jesus. And it’s all because someone asked them to be holy. I’ve always thought the best way to reach young people was with truth and goodness and beauty, with the meat of the faith not pizza and cozy relativism. This summer program does it: no gimmicks and nothing washed down, just solid theology, intense prayer, and the expectation that you’ll give everything. Once you go all in, you’ll be amazed at what God can do with your meager gifts.

All you have to do is fill in the talent. Hey look, it's me!
Just fill in the talent. Hey look, it’s me!

Why am I telling you all this? Because you can do the same thing–and way more easily than they did. St. John’s believes in this program so much, they want you to have it, too. They’ve done all the legwork for you. They’ve put together all their resources: camp schedule, classes and curriculum, payroll info, even the forms you have to fill out to be accredited in Maryland. And they want to give it to any Catholic parish. For free.

Seriously, all you have to do is take the work they’ve poured into this money-making, grace-filled game-changer, write your name at the top, and sign at the bottom. They’ll help you through the whole process, simply because they see what the Holy Spirit is doing through their program. Will you think about it? Take a look at the St. John’s website to see what their camp is like, and maybe glance at St. Joseph’s, which is starting a camp this summer modeled after St. John’s. Then go see what they’re really all about and send the info to your parish. All you have to do to have access to literally all of their resources is contact the camp director and ask for the password.

I’ll be honest: I’m not sure how this camp will translate under different leadership. I think a lot of the transformation of these kids comes from the fact that their pastor and their youth minister are holy men with hearts for youth and no apparent need for personal time. But if you’ve got godly leadership on board, this summer program could do more than use your space wisely. It can strengthen your parish and make saints of your youth all while putting your parish back in the black. Sounds like a pretty sweet deal to me.

And if you’re near Southern Maryland, check out the classes they have to offer:

SJSP schedule 1SJSP schedule

  1. In 2 years, the camp has brought in at least 9 new students to the school. [↩]
  2. Speaking of which, I just revamped the schedule to give you a better sense of Biblical history, spread out the hard stuff, and generally make it more awesome. Expect that post next week, God willing. [↩]

A Challenge to the Church on Her Birthday

This morning, I went to Mass at the church across town, one I rarely go to.  I’m not sure that I’ve ever met the pastor, although many of my friends are parishioners.  After I received communion, Father asked me if I was an Extraordinary Minister of Holy Communion (a lay person commissioned to distribute the Eucharist).  I was fairly taken aback, as I don’t usually make conversation with Jesus in my mouth.  “Not here,” I said.

“The ciborium’s on the altar,” Father continued.  “Take communion up to the choir.”  Now I’m a good Catholic, so when a priest tells me to do something at Mass, I do it.  I went back, got the ciborium (bowl of consecrated hosts), and went back to the choir loft.

Now, I’m so much not a member of this church that I had to stop at one of the pews and ask for directions to the choir loft.  I was very confused that Father had asked me, of all people.  I don’t even know him.

But this is a small town.  And he knows me.  He knows that I’m a religion teacher.  He probably knows that I’m discerning consecrated life.  I would imagine that he knows I used to live in Georgia and I recently bought a car and I wear size 10 shoes and I hate bananas.  Because that is how small towns work.

People complain about small town life but, after two years, I’m sorry to go.  There’s something about being known by the people around you.  Sure, you can’t go to Walmart in your pajamas without being judged by your kindergarten teacher and your mechanic, but you also can’t fly under the radar.  Wherever you go, people are interested in you.  They ask what’s wrong when you look a mess.  They hear about your big news through the grapevine and are excited for you, even if they barely know you.  Strangers walk up to me and tell me they’ve seen my study guides.  How do you know me and why do you care?  Because it’s a small town and that’s what we do—we know and we care.

I’m a social person.  I’m such an extravert that I have to take breaks from work to talk to people or I’ll never accomplish anything.  So it stands to reason that I would enjoy always having someone to chat with.  I wasn’t surprised when, after years of suburban sprawl, I loved small town life.

I think, though, that small towns fill a need we all have: the need for community.  We need the accountability of being missed when we skip Mass.  We need the accountability of being noticed when we’re out two-timing our spouses.  We need to know that what we do and say does not go unnoticed, that our sins hurt not only us but the body of Christ.  Small towns sure as heck provide that.

We also need to know that we are needed, that we are known and loved, that we belong to something bigger than ourselves.  We need to know that people care about us.  Sure, it’s hard when people get gossipy or judgmental, but that’s the fault of fallen people, not of community.

I love living in a small town because it does for me what my parish rarely has: it provides community.  I’ve found few Catholic churches that really feel like family; not the way Atchison does, anyway.

There are a lot of reasons that Catholics leave the Church for various Protestant denominations: difficult Church teachings, bad Church music, and blah preaching are high on the list.  But I think a huge player in this game is the fact that Protestant churches are real communities.  They’re not just buildings where people happen to show up once a week.  In the best cases, they’re the social center of the parishioners’ lives.  This is where you see your friends, where you met your wife, where you go for love and support.

He was generally less enthused than I about the holy sacrifice of the Mass.

For Catholics, not so much.  Take this example: when I was 25, I spent half a year in a parish where I went to Mass every day.  In a crowd of about 40, I was the only person between the ages of 7 and 45.  I took my baby nephew with me every day.  At the end of my time there, Father still didn’t know my name.

I spoke with a Protestant friend about this.  She mentioned that she had started seeing someone but she didn’t want to take him to church with her.  “You know how gossipy church ladies get,” she said.

“No, actually, I don’t,” I replied.  “People at my church don’t care who I’m dating.  They don’t even know my name.”

This isn’t God’s plan for church communities.  Protestants have “church homes.”  Catholics go to a dozen different parishes depending on convenience.  In most cases, we don’t know each other.  We duck in right before Mass and hurry out after communion, eager to beat the traffic.  Churches try to combat this with soup suppers and doughnuts after Mass, but it rarely works.

It comes down to this: Catholics are really good at having the Church.  We’re not so good at having churches.  These aren’t communities.  We’re not walking together, supporting one another.  The Mass is all about community as we speak together in the plural voice, and yet we don’t know each other.  It’s ironic, the faceless anonymity we cling to as we celebrate the redemptive death of a God who commanded that we love each other as he loved us.  He loved us enough to die for us.  We don’t love each other enough to learn each other’s names.  Seems sketchy to me.

So I guess I’m really asking a question here.  What are we doing wrong?  Why are Catholic churches so rarely home to people?  Have you seen a church home done well–Catholic or Protestant?  What can parishes do differently to bring people in, to build relationships and genuine community?  Can this happen at the parish level or does it have to be part of some lay movement of like-minded people?  On this feast of Pentecost, the birthday of the Holy Church, can we figure out a way that our churches become our families?

I guess I just feel as though my church ought to be more a place of fellowship than the clearance aisle at Walmart.  Call me crazy.

 

Give me your thoughts in the comments!